Covet

It's difficult not to spend money.  It's actually something I pray about.

Online shopping is a big culprit, as well as confusing needs with wants, and, finally, social spending.

Social spending is when I spend money on events or food in order to spend time with friends.

I have also been convicted by God Himself that it is detrimental to my relationship with Him to make every one of my excursions from my house an opportunity to shop for my next vehicle.

Lately I've been checking out every vehicle and giving it a yes, no, or maybe rating as to whether or not I would buy it, and then checking its make and model while at stop lights, while waiting for guests at work, and while in the parking lot at Target.  It's enhancing my car knowledge so I can keep up in conversation with others, I say to myself.  But really, this behavior was creating an obsession within that is overtaking my thoughts in an unhealthy way.

I am saving for a vehicle, but will shop when the time comes rather than months before which causes impatience and covetousness.

I looked up the word "covet" recently since I'm not supposed to do that according to God.  I used to think it was wanting something that someone else had (being jealous of it or wanting to steal it), but according to the dictionary, it's just wanting something very badly, obsessing over it, longing for it; you get the idea.  This is ground-breaking.

This is why I feel convicted when I want very badly and long for things to go my way and when I shop for cars at traffic lights.

Sometimes in order to avoid feelings of covetousness when it comes to things I can buy, I cave and purchase what I want almost immediately.  This, then, becomes another issue: not being a good steward of my money.

I did some social spending today on a meal at a restaurant called Snap.  Then I went to a bookstore and bought two journals I don't need yet just because I felt like it.

Profanity is something else I'm praying about.  I was in the car with my friend on the way home from Snap and she used some of this horrible Profanity.  I looked, at her, surprised and amazed, and she told me she had been struggling with it lately. "Me too!" I enthused.  We prayed immediately.

There's a verse in the Bible I like to ignore about how salt water and fresh water cannot come out of the same spring, and in the same way, dirty language won't come out of a clean heart.

I like to use profanity to give my words impact, but I think the idea that cursing gives words impact is a lie from the Enemy.  I can make my words sharp and meaningful, as well as respectful with my wealthy vocabulary anytime I want.  I use dirty language around people who use it too, and I never thought I'd be one of those individuals who did things to fit in, but here I am.

God says to be in the world but not part of it and I'm definitely blending in.